The strategy for conducting the war in Afghanistan has changed. We are now trying to convince the folks that we love them and really don’t mean to go through the villages slaughtering everyone. The average citizen in that country is afraid of the Taliban and apparently don’t want them in power. Our mission is to tell the citizens we are there to protect them from the Taliban. The Taliban are very strict fundamentalist and won’t even let the girls attend school. The Taliban also allows al-Queda to run freely and permit them to have training camps that will launch terrorist attacks against the US and others.

We need more troops to accomplish this new love mission. It would seem hard to tell who is the average Afghan citizen and who is al-Queda. These guys are all covered with facial hair and have sheets wrapped around their body and head. Who is the enemy?

The President is about to permit gays to be open in the military. No more of this hush, hush stuff about no asking or telling. This should greatly increase the number of gays in the military. I have nothing against gays but if I were a member of that group I would prefer to be in San Francisco rather than Afghanistan. The Muslims don’t take to homosexuals very well. They usually behead them after removal of the genitalia. The main advantage of having the homosexuals would be that they would be better able to carry out our new mission of loving the citizens. The main problem will be to have the soldiers stop loving each other so that they will have time for the hairy Afghan men. I don’t know what attracts lesbians to each other but in Afghanistan they are going to have to be satisfied with the eyes because that’s all you can see of their women.

My how times have changed. We used to want mean, bull riding, redneck types in the army. They were better killers. Now we are moving to an army of homosexuals. Maybe there is something we don’t know. The new weapons of mass destruction may be AIDS or other STDs. These weapons may be more effective than the sophisticated stuff we now have. Our current weapons don’t seem to be very effective, so it’s time for a new approach.

The view from the porch is very foggy this morning. That is in keeping with our future and our military presence in Afghanistan. The nice thing about the fog is that I can’t see the deer very well as they destroy my yard.