Tuesday, December 16, 2008

The Feds have slashed interest rates again and consumer prices fell by 1.7% last month, which is the greatest fall in over 60 years. Gas prices continue to fall and Congress is considering a bailout for those who can’t pay the mortgage on their homes. Hopefully, this will slow the recession.

All this is a great Christmas present. The banks will be giving away money and the department stores will be having discount sales. The sale of SUVs should again reach record highs giving relief to the faltering auto industry with giant bonuses for the executives and big raises for the autoworkers. Forget the energy crisis and global warming. Let the planet melt. I’m going out and buy a Cadillac Escapade and one of those bus like RVs. We can make a trip around the country with the RV pulling the Escapade. Before we leave I plan to contact a builder and start the new home my spouse has been dreaming about. The great thing about all this is that I can borrow all the money or pay this stuff out over time and if I default on anything the government will bail me out.

I’m glad the government can print so much money. We live in a great country that has the printing presses to print all these bills. The Indians and old timers used to trade with gold and other valuables like furs and beads. Now, it’s a lot easier to just print the money and use it to get the stuff we want. At one time we worked for the bills but now the government is going to give us all we want. Even if my house and worldly belongings are destroyed by a natural disaster the government will replace them.

Even though I lost a lot of my retirement in the recent stock market downturn, I don’t really need to worry anymore because the government is going to rescue me.

Life on the porch promises to get better again because the government is going to take care of everything. All I need to do now is figure out how to get the Feds to rid my place of the pesky deer.


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