Wednesday, November 24, 2010


The things people say today are incredible compared to when I was a kid. This week the Pope is talking about condoms and the new airline screening is introducing all sort of private words. When I was a kid, I didn’t even think about some of the things said and done in the open today. I didn’t have magazines like Playboy or movies with explicit sex scenes. My only pornographic magazine was National Geographic, but I rarely saw one of these because we couldn’t afford a publication like that. I would sneak around and look up dirty words in the dictionary, like pregnant. That was about the extent of my education. I finally learned what caused babies when I was in medical school. Before that, I was concerned that kissing might impregnate a girl. That was what movies, in my time, led me to believe. Seeing Jane Russell’s cleavage in “The Outlaw” and Marilyn Monroe’s legs when her dress blew up in “The Seven Year Itch”, were porno flicks for me.

The airport security has been amazing this week. All the perverts are applying for jobs as screeners. They get to fondle people all day long. If we let those folks have the jobs, they should be very effective and this would also serve to reduce crimes involving rape and other forms of abuse. Priest might even be able to work part time and this would save the church millions of dollars in suits. Anyway, the screeners get to feel peoples “junk” and also view them naked on the scanner. This has to be a great job.

The other interesting story of the week is the Pope saying the use of condoms might be okay in certain situations. I didn’t even think the Pope knew what a condom was. He said they might be justified to control the spread of AIDS. Specifically, he said that male prostitutes would be accepting moral responsibility by using condoms to prevent the spread of AIDS. I guess he thinks it’s morally okay for the guy to be a prostitute in the fist place. Boy, this stuff is really confusing to me.

All this use of once forbidden terminology and exposure to private anatomical parts and private acts didn’t start this week. The cracks in our moral fiber and the sexual revolution started back in the 1960s, shortly after introduction of the birth control pill. Homosexuals also started sneaking out of the closet at about the same time and are now making headway to be legally married and recognized in the military.

It’s hard to imagine what things will be like in another 50 years. I suspect people will be running around completely nude and freely copulating on the street. Even the deer and other wild animals in my back yard are able to restrain themselves better than humans. Humans appear to be descending rather than ascending from lower animal forms. Even the porch won’t be safe in the future.

3 Comments:

Blogger B(O)B said...

This one "cracks" me up! I can't stop laughing! One of your best!

8:52 AM  
Blogger Mark said...

Too funny!

7:07 AM  
Blogger jeff ludwick said...

Thank goodness, I am not alone in my misery and confusion!!! This would be funny if it were not true. I see things in WalMart and Target these days that we used to pay a cover charge to see in college. I will not be surprised to see women begin to carry their own private pole for dancing with them in the malls before long. Do you think the Pope is on crack cocaine? Maybe the screeners and scanners have gotten to him and he is just caving in.........

6:44 AM  

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